In his book Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships, John Welwood talks about self-love in the most beautiful way. We find God in beautiful things and he reminds us that God is also present in the ugly, unpleasant things. Recognizing what is alive in us in the present moment is a way towards self-love.
To recognize that right now I am only feeling concerned for myself. Right now, I am stingy, I am aggressive, I am unkind. And to neither condemn it nor condone it but just recognize it. It allows me to be open to that feeling and go into it with a greater sense of acceptance. This allows that feeling to have space within me, to be seen and heard.
To acknowledge that all of these are parts of me, that I am a multidimensional being with multiple experiences, multiple concepts and memories of who I am – is a step towards experiencing my wholeness without judgement.
To be open to it all and just be. That is self-love.