Fear helps us survive, it keeps us safe. And if we allow it full power, we pay the costs of growth, authentic connections, vibrance, and expansive experiences.
Do you remember the last time you felt your heart break? Did the pain feel endless, the possibility of recovery remote, if not inconceivable? Did the days feel long? Did you feel numbed and lifeless?
And yet, while you were in your grips of pain, life continued, inside and outside you. Your body continued to function the best it could. The world outside went on as always.
Over time, the pain became dull, the memory blurred, and you regained your capacity to move forward.
This process could take days, weeks, months or years but it will happen. Breaking and building is part of the human experience.
It is only when we resist this law of nature that we are unable to move forward from a traumatic or difficult experience. This is usually a conscious choice, however much we deny it, blame circumstances or other people. The choice is based on the fear of opening ourselves to pain and heartbreak again.
When we stay in fear, we stay safe. But we also end up saying No to many of life’s experiences that make us stronger and better. If we accept that suffering is inevitable, and focus on building our capacity to face it, we can experience life in all its colours and grow into wise adults.